Having a random hookup so left but love u
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize