If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
