Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize
