no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
