dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
