Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize