if only i could text you this smell
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
We got so high we made milksteak
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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