Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
