I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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