I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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