I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
