no you cant smoke seaweed
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
