dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
