I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
