I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize