If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize
