Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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