she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
He had one of those small greek statue penises
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize
