he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
