Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
well you can't waste a boner
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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