I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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