Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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