Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
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