i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
how does that bad decision feel?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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