Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
There r osticjed everywhere
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
