I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
