The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
