He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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