woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
