I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
