You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
