Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Randomize
