i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
me + whiskey = a bad person
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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