Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Randomize
