every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
