the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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