that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
