Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
