Jerry, you need to find god
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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