Who did Billy Mays play for?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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