We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
