i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
the raccoons are back...
Randomize