the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
