Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize