I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
