Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
