So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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