so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
