CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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