Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
